9.12.2005

used to mean alot, mean alot to me. now it doesn't mean, doesn't mean a thing



it wasn't that i didn't understand you, or even that you refused to understand me. it was something darker, more sacred that led to the end of our affair.

do you remember that day at the park when the rain fell hard on us? we both forgot our jackets and gave in to the wet. we weren't ready to say goodbye and it was easier to stay. you laughed at me and said i looked so flat wet. i knew you didn't mean it but i was embarrassed anyway. i wanted you to see me as shiny and new. curved and alive. flat and wet made me feel empty. seeing my mood had change you grabbed my hand and ran. my feet flew out from under me as i followed.

at the top of the hill in our wooden cart i could see the entire city. you pointed on the way up and said one day we will live out there together and there will be a roof to keep out our rain. i wanted to believe you and smiled. but we had to reach the top there was no other way. it was time to take the leap. just then you leaned over and whispered, "don't be afraid i am right here" and we fell. everyone was screaming, dozens of hands waved with glee. but i sat perfectly silent and still. i knew that soon we would reach the bottom and the ride would end. i didn't want to be alone.

sometimes one minute is enough to change everything that comes after it. sometimes you would give every moment after to take back just one. if you are lucky your life will have a little of both.

3 comments:

Noelle12 said...

Where did you get that? Did you write it? I really really like it. Wow.

t said...

hey thanks. yes i wrote it. for the most part my blog is fiction that runs frantic in my head and then finds it's way here. nice of you to stop by and very kind of you to comment.

Tara said...

:sigh:
that's all =)