i used to think that i would get over it, but everything just got over me

have you ever run into someone who compliments everyone insincerely? nice hat! oh i love those shoes, they are so cute. it would seem to me that this could often be roughly translated to "who let you out of the house like that, you look awful!?" the thing is they are usually pretty good with the delivery. they have created their entire persona around bullshitting, brown-nosing...or as i like to think...mocking. silent. venomous. wreckless.

maybe you don't even know if someone amongst you is one of them. they are coy and camouflage themselves. but sooner or later it will become clear. maybe at first it is just a feeling, like why is this person always so nice? and maybe this will be accompanied by a feeling of guilt. should i be that nice? am i a bitch? this may continue on for months, you may even start to compliment people yourself but it won't come off as convincing, it's an art you know.

so then how do you know? well the clincher, the thing that will seal the deal as it were is the moment you witness them compliment someone and then turn to you and say something polar opposite to that which they just stated out loud for all to hear. trust is an easy street when you are on it, deviate from the plan and you are on your own. it isn't the same.

so why do people do it? a part of me longs to believe that it is about being positive, that they want to spread some sort of good will. but still underneath it all there is this nagging feeling that they do it because they are just shitty people who like to laugh at the world while smiling shit eating grins. or they have no confidence (or maybe that is me writing this now, don't worry the thought isn't lost on me...still it is my blog after all). apparently i root for the underdog so really i should believe the last, however, my pessimistic tendencies win here. stop being such an ass. if you like the shoes, say it. if you don't keep your mouth shut. nobody is buying that crap anyway.

but then that is just my two cents and really they ain't worth much. although some might claim they will put me one step closer to cuba. i could use the vacation.