it's just bad timing that's all

the camping trip didn't go as well as i hoped it would. as i was packing the car on friday i had a nagging feeling that we shouldn't go, maybe it was the thick clouds rolling in over the mountains, or the terrible forecast for the weekend, or maybe it was just that everything felt a little off. whatever the reason, i should have listened to that voice, but instead, as we are all apt to do, i went ahead with the plan.

the things i am remembering most right now:
1. the rain. the torrential rain that began to pelt on the roof of the tent sometime in the wee hours of friday night and continued almost without reprieve until our departure on sunday.
2. cohen's lack of happiness and nearly constant state of distress. this would be the main umbrella where i would put his fever, his crankiness and his lack of appetite and my worry about all of the above (we now think all of this was a direct result of new teeth).
3. complaining, so much complaining.


things i am not remembering most right now but that i hope will be the true memory that stands the test of time.
1. that satisfied feeling of setting up camp. the careful planning and executing of tarps and tents into a configuration that makes the space feel like home despite the weather. knowing that when it rains it is ok, we are ok, there will be no leaking.
2. finally in a fit of frustration (i am not going to have the only memory of his first birthday be of him miserable and upset!) packing up cohen and marko and our swimming gear (which i foolishly brought thinking that the weather might turn around and a lake swim might happen) and heading to the squamish aquatic centre where we splashed and laughed and forgot for a moment that the weekend wasn't turning out so fantastic. cohen didn't have as much energy for the pool as he normally would, but we got some smiles and there weren't any tears!
3. sitting in front of the fire, dry and warm under the tarp as the rain pelted above us, sick and needy cohen nestled snuggly into my chest, fast asleep, dreaming of trees.
4. the bbq'ed steak and chicken dinner enjoyed with a bottle of red wine and some pretty fantastic friends, oh and the chocolate cake with raspberries and whipped cream for dessert (mmm steak and cake).

so the weekend wasn't great. the expectation wasn't met. there were no fantastic back to nature photos taken, no whipped cream on noses or splashes in lakes, but there was family, my family and that is always something to celebrate. i feel very lucky for all that i have, even when it is raining outside, and have lost enough in life to know how important it is to cherish everything that you have. i do. still, i hope that next time we get some sun!

i plan on one more birthday post, a retrospective of sorts, so look for that in the next couple of days.

this last photo was taken in the aquatic centre parking lot. we had left our campsite and driven down the highway to squamish with this poor slug on our car. we only realized once we got there and saw him clinging to the side, likely very confused. by the look on cohen's face he wasn't the only one!