eight is enough, but i only made it through 5

so i am giving it up cold turkey. let's say it is my way of celebrating lent and yes i know that technically lent started a few days ago but push aside the technicalities for the moment. i am needing a reason, religion is sitting there waiting for me to use it.

i am not going to my writing class anymore. it is hard to describe to someone who hasn't been there but it is a horrible experience. i work all day and then kill a couple of hours, usually eating some shitty campus food, before going into class where i sit with a gaggle of people who come across as pretentious and annoying and i discuss stories i am not particularly fond of. i learn nothing. i could sit at home and read a website for 10 minutes about point of view and be more enlightened then the 2.5 hours i spend in that awful curved back hard plastic chair.

the worst is how we have to "workshop" stories. i sit and i read these stories and i try like mad to come up with something constructive to say but i am not programmed for this function. i can't loosely throw around words like cadence nor can i discuss indepth the use of the first person in the context as opposed to the third person omniscient. i am an internal thinker. so when it comes time for me to add my two cents to the piggy bank i always come up blank and foolish. i leave there everytime feeling incompetent and exhausted. so i quit. there it is. i am a quitter. time to embrace it for what it is.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

oh well, you tried. you can consider yourself a trier-outer (what?) rather than a quiter. embrace letting go of things you don't want or need. i think you would have enjoyed my class more ;-) but then again I would have talked you out of taking my class for fear of making an ass of myself!... xol